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This fake Windows 95 parody is painfully modern

Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.
Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.
Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.
@Windows95Tips

The parody Twitter account, @Windows95Tips, bitterly mocks the impossibly over-complicated universe of Microsoft Windows in 1995. The account — which is not run by Neil Cicierega, who created Windows95Tips.com — returned in August after a mysterious, two-year hiatus to inflict even more humor-based suffering. For anyone who remembers what it was like to use Windows in the ‘90s, these dreadful experiences might hit a little too close to home.

The most painful part is that product promotion hasn’t evolved very much in 20 years.

As mobile devices replace desktops, it seems like phones and tablets are nearly as complicated:

This is basically how I feel about my iPhone 6 (and social media in general):

I don’t know why I need so many options to do so few things.

The only positive spin I can put on the modern connected life — besides it being far superior in terms of getting work done and watching videos — is that I can carry tiny computers in my backpack now. Yay?

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